Beaty’s Blog

For the past two years I have looked forward to mid Dec.  This is the time that I get two months off from school.  I remember last year the freedom that I felt.  It was as if a giant burden was lifted off of me.  This year is not the case.  I don’t really feel any relief.  It may because my grades are not in yet.  It may be bc I have to start working on some things now to get ready for next semester. All I can think about is what I need and could do for my jobs, school, wedding, etc..  I just feel drained.  There just seems to be so much stuff going on.  Saying that makes me think of the amount of people that echo my sentiments. Everyone is busy.   Perhaps we are all too busy.  I guess it is the culture.   We are always jumping from one project to another under the functional assumption that constant productivity or busyness will lead to fulfillment, nirvana, paradise, or whatever else heaven is for you and me.  The funny thing is that my happiest times in life are moments when “time” and “productivity” are not factors.  Maybe we are too worried about what “it” can be in life.  The obsession with progress robs us of the ability to see beauty here and now.   Who seriously is able to be in a moment and enjoy it for what it is?  I know I can’t, but I’d like to learn.